New words

I learnt a couple of new words recently from our friends at El Reg.

Blogtard – a blogger who is not at the pinnacle of intellectual capacity.

Celebtard (or celebutard) – a celebrity who is not the pinnacle of intellectual capacity (Paris Hilton seems to be the classic example)

In fact it seems you can remove the ‘re’ from retard and put tard of the end of anything for an instant mild insult.

I havent come up with a decent ***tard that might describe a spreadsheet user who is not at the pinnacle of intellectual capacity. Any suggestions?

Hope you had a good break, we did (/are doing), although the smurflings are beginning to go mildly stir crazy. Surprising as they haven’t completely broken every Christmas toy yet.



6 Responses to “New words”

  1. MikeC Says:

    Morning Simon, hope you’ve managed to get thru the period without running the local shops out of Nurofen! =;-)

    “IFtard”* is about the best I can come up with at the moment. It sounds OK to me, but I am suffering with a 2-week hangover atm, so it’s probably pretty lousy.

    *inspired by just having been asked AGAIN how many IFs can be nested in a single formula by someone who just doesn’t get how ORs and ANDs work and tries to nest a separate IF for every instance possible (27 in this case!) for a grand total of 2 possible outputs…

  2. Rob Bruce Says:

    IFtard is very good.

    If(!) I had a pound for every time I’ve replaced a moronically nested IF with a simple and maintainable lookup table, I’d have lots and lots of pounds indeed.

  3. Harlan Grove Says:

    Usertard seems redundant to me.

    How about self-proclaimed expertards?

  4. Simon Says:

    Excellent suggestions!

    I like expertard, what about Gurutard? (Gutard?)

    I was also thinking of clicktard for keen mousers. (keytard for keyboarders?)

    And of course Ribtard for anyone who likes the ribbon! (both of them)

    Vtard – those who use VBA when there is a simple Excel alternative?

  5. Harlan Grove Says:

    Speaking of ‘tards, I’ve been tracking the fuss over Office 2003 SP3 disabling access to files in older formats. For Excel, that doesn’t appear to include any of the .XLS file formats, but does include .DIF and .SLK formats.

    Does anyone have any idea how to inject anything remotely malicious into .DIF files? Extra long lines to cause buffer overflow?

  6. Jon Peltier Says:

    My (cynical) take on the limitation of file types is to reduce the need to support conversion among the file types. I don’t see the security issues. If there’s a security issue with a certain file type, protection should be built into the application. It makes little sense to build the protection into a file format. Maybe limiting these file types in 2003 might lower the volume of complaints about their removal in 2007.

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